Security

In my line of work I pay attention to homes/buildings and neighborhoods in ways most people do not. I was driving to a client's home the other day when I drove down a lightless street. There were street lights, but none of the homes were lit. How does that feel when you think about it. Do you want your car to stall on this street? Or on one with welcoming well lit homes? If you are going to break into a home and steal things which house do you think is less likely to be inhabited? Less trouble for your task?

Your home is safe because of your intent. The messages you send with your actions. All the lights are out? The blinds and curtains are all drawn? Afraid? Most likely. Ask a policeman. Are you more likely to draw unwanted attention by looking confident and alert, or by walking and reading, being plugged into your i-pod, or looking down at the ground as you walk. You already know the answer. I would bet that having a home that looks loved, welcoming, and inhabited is much better safety measure than any security system. Better yet, know and be on good terms with your neighbors. "Yeah, we watched the guys in the van carry away your big screen. Was there a problem?" These "precautions" require you to overcome fear. Fear of strangers, both your neighbors and the people your welcoming home might draw. Fear of looking like you are not afraid! And perhaps fear of not being afraid.

In the West, fashion follows stereotypical ideals. To (over-)generalize, all womens' clothing promotes vulnerability or perceived vulnerability. Run in heels? Clothing that offers adequate coverage? Men's suits cover them like armor. Men only expose themselves when they are perceived as powerful in other ways, i.e. sports. Or to attract mates. Don't get me wrong, it feels great to look great, to dress great, but what is the basis of that greatness. Step back, outside the framework of "women must be vulnerable to be beautiful and men must be concealed to be strong" and look for something better. Choose. People will pay attention.

This is the water we swim in. Yet fish have grown lungs and walked on land... so I am told.

My hope is that we will shed this fear that drives far too much of our decision making. That we can become motivated and grounded in something better.

Confident in who and what we are. And proud of that.

I will do my part. I promise.